Sweet Stranger

I find myself where I’ve been before. Everything is the same, yet somehow greatly different. The people still remain as I remember them but there’s a change in them… a silent secret I know nothing of. It’s as if I’m missing something. As if I’m the outsider now. C’est la vie, I suppose. But I can’t shake the feeling that I don’ belong here anymore. That I’m no longer part of this cycle. It’s their time to shine. This is made all the more clear when they begin to share stories. Stories I’m not a part of. Stories I wasn’t there to witness. I’m an outsider. I don’t belong any more.

They were so happy to see me and I equally ecstatic to see them again. We talked, laughed, and joked as if nothing had changed. As if I hadn’t been away for months. As if I belonged. We were trapped in a time capsule, where we were all equals. Where we all belonged. Then reality struck again when it came time for them to depart. I couldn’t’ follow them this time. I wasn’t a part of what they were doing. I would never be a part of that anymore.

I thought this would work out more like a puzzle. Where we each had our own intricate designs, yet when we came to together, we fit. We fit in with each other to paint a beautiful picture of friendship. And no matter how far apart the pieces scattered, when we came together, we’d still have that same image. We’d still fit. I’d still fit. But it’s not so. Some of the pieces are worn, damaged even, now. Some pieces do not fit where they once did and the picture can never be the same. It’s a sad realization I’ve come to. But this is the way it is.

Make no mistake, I greatly enjoy anytime I spend with my friends and always wish I had more time. Who else can you laugh at David Bowie’s “smuggled grapefruits” and crappy 80s green-screening with? (Tra la la) Even in doing the most random of tasks, we still enjoyed each others’ company. At the very least, I enjoyed theirs.
Maybe we won’t be a perfectly fitted puzzle again, but hopefully the pieces can all remain in the same box…

.:~o*’Kaylyn’*o~:.