Well, the calendar don't lie...

I've realized I haven't been writing as frequently as I used to. Or, well, publishing. Call it a lack of inspiration, motivation, determination... whatever-ation. Whenever I sit down to read other people's blog (because I enjoy it), I think I'm going to find something that strikes some sort of cord within me, makes me think, or something. But what I find is that people are just writing how their day went--what they did, what they saw, how truly weird they were 4 years ago. Then I begin to think maybe I should write that openly and honestly. Sadly, I realize there's nothing particularly interesting or thought-provoking or (in my opinion) blog-worthy. So I'll just start pounding the keys and maybe with writing will come purpose.

A lot of people are raising their concerns about the end of the year. What will I do? Will I still have friends? I can't believe they're leaving me (bastards). And the like. Whenever people, mostly family, ask me how long I have left, my usual response has become "Too long," or something of that nature. It gains a laugh and quick change of subject. Exactly what I wanted. It's only to my closest friends and even family that I say "Maaaan, I can't believe I'm about to graduate. I'm not ready!" (Commence bitching and moaning)

I'm not ready to live on my own. I'm far too childish for that.
I'm not ready to have my friends scattered. I'm far too unstable for that.
I'm not ready to "take the next step to the rest of my life." I'm far too... confused about what that even means!

What does that even mean? College is preparing you for the "real world" as high school prepared you for college, and middle school for high school before that. And elementary so on and so forth. I'm sorry scholars, but in my opinion, that's complete bullshit, okay? There's no way college is the "real world." You can't tell me people who had to drop out of high school due to circumstances beyond their control (or even because of their own descisions) aren't in the real world. They're in the realest world there is! Everyday, day in and day out; waking at 5am to get the kids out of bed and dressed, to catch that bus to that crappy public school, because they can't afford to send them to the fancy private one across town; walking to the bus stop 15 blocks away, because they can't go out and buy a car like everyone has told them too time and time again; then preparing to work that awful job, which they hate but can't get a better one... all because they never graduated.

If I were foolish enough to believe that, then I would believe everyone who goes to college gets a job they love that pays very well and lives happily ever after.

Yeah... I don't think so. In the words of Hannah Montana (yes, Hannah freaking Montana!): Life's what you make it, so let's make it rock!

.:~o*'Kaylyn'*o~:.